Where to begin...

Well, here I am again, folks. I apologize to everyone who has uploaded stuff recently and hasn't gotten favorites from me. I've got 83 deviations to go through in my inbox for now, and fear not, I will get to them soon enough. Lately I've been going through a lot of stuff, and while it's not particularly bad stuff, it is still extremely time consuming.

First things first. I didn't take a lot of pictures in Colorado this time around, however I did take enough to post a small series, and I'll sort through my iPhoto library and pull those out for you guys to enjoy. As for why I haven't been posting much of anything at all recently, well, it's because I've been working my @$$ off on REMNANTS. I have the first issue almost halfway done. Well almost almost. There will be coloring to do for the next week or so, and then I can start sketching up more panels and pages. As of this writing, there are enough panels scanned in to make up around 8 pages, and I will be sketching more as soon as possible. Unfortunately there is one thing that may pose a problem.


COLLEGE.

Dun dun dunnnn....


Yes, I have my first class the 24th, and I actually have to do good this semester. I'm not taking any online classes (Which are the ones I failed last time around... shame on me.), and I am only taking my classes on Monday/Wednesdays, from 5-8 or so. (That's both classes.) So I will have those classes to deal with and their courseload. Public Speaking and Algebra. What a combo, right? Well, at least I only have 2 classes this time, instead of 4 last time. I think shortening my courseload is a smart way to go, and this will enable me to get myself a job.

Oh yeah, a Job.

See I've never had one. And I don't think that's a good thing. But I'm sticking applications anywhere I can think of, and I plan on annoying them until they hire me. I need a job. Bad. Why? Well, I'm in need of money, now that I actually have a social life.




I know, right? I have found friends and have actually managed to stick with them. There's a whole list, too. There's Brandon, Bekah, Pippin, Dillon, Katie, Marie, Zane, Orin, Brina, Courtney, and more I can't think of. (I'm sorry whoever I might have forgotten!!)

Anyway, we've all been heading down into what we call the Acid Tunnels.


*STORYTIME!!*

Once upon a time, there were these kids. They were stupid kids. They decided to go down into the drainage tunnels in the downtown area and see what they could find. They went missing for a few days, and when they came out, their faces were disfigured from Acid burns, and they only thought they'd been gone a few hours. These tunnels from whence they came were thereafter known as the Acid Tunnels, and no one has ever gone in since.

*Storytime over.*


Actually, there are kids in it all the time, just to scare themselves. Unfortunately there's nothing really scary down there 'cept for bats. And they're not that bad. The worst part of the tunnels is the water, of which there isn't much except near the end of the tunnel, which is nearly flooded to the calf, and there's no way to go through it without ending up wet somehow. Even though we've all set up stepping stones in the waterways, there's a huge section that's deeper than the rest of it and it isn't short enough to be jumped. Anyway.


Our group heads down there on Friday nights when we're all free, look at the graffiti and spook each other out. It's a lot of fun! Only it's about to get better. See, my friend Dillon, who has a penchant for this sort of thing, has this idea to scare the entire group to bits. Set a t-shirt near the entrance, ripped up, later on, there's a flashlight in what looks like a little bit of blood, and then near the end, some 'thing' eating a dead body. That 'thing' will be Dillon, wearing a black hockey mask and doing a freaky spider walk at us. Cue screaming and running.

I plan to have a video camera going the whole time, Blair Witch style. With some good editing, we could make a short film out of it. Keep an eye out for it on here.




In all seriousness, however, I do have a great time with these guys, playing Resident Evil, Obscure, Guitar Hero, hanging out in Tunnels, doing idiotic shit. It's the kind of stuff I miss from High School.

Oh wait, I forgot, I never did anything like this in High School. I wasn't cool enough, and didn't have these friends. Otherwise that would have made HS somewhat interesting for the last three years' worth. Oh well.

(Anyone with an aversion to me whining about my love live (or lack thereof) should stop reading here and skip ahead to the part that says "The end."


While we're on the topic of my personal life (as opposed to the one I live on facebook and dA that are completely problem free), I have a little (long) complaint (confession) about who I might (might not) like (love).


Did that make sense? Didn't think so...


See I have this friend. And she's awesome. Like in almost every way. She's fiercely independent, able to take care of herself and others whenever needed. She's athletic, with an amazing sense of humor, and she's willing to play along with the rest of the group's idiotic suggestions for passing time. Oftentimes she'll initiate some of it.

She's been a friend of mine for a few months now, and I keep noticing times when I met her before, and hadn't remembered it. Like at the fair two, three, maybe four years ago. She and I and my former best friend all hung out for the day, and it was awesome. She was awesome.

Fast forward to present day, and she's on the track team, got her own ride, her own group of homies who I fit in perfectly with (which is no small feat, let me assure you.).

And I think I love her.


Knew that was coming, didn't ya?

See, I know her. Not well enough to say I'm anywhere near 'best friend' status, but I know her well enough to know when stuff is wrong, or when she wants to be left alone, or when she's pissed. I have more than a cursory knowledge of her friends/past love life/general personality and all that, but it's not quite enough to give me enough boldness to ask her anything about her and I.

And I might have lost a chance. Here's her deal: She never dates. Never. And when anyone comes up and asks her or even brings up the topic of love or dating, she instantly goes on the defensive and says, 'whatever you want to do, it's just not for me.' For as long as I've known her. She's insecure about liking people because her mom and dad are divorced, and she's had to deal with that, and some pretty bad breakups in the past (But pretty far back in the past, so nothing recent.)

And to my surprise, I hear she's dating. And then Facebook has the kindness to let me know she's in a relationship.


So here I am. Jealous as hell. Of a guy I don't even know. Who I may or may not have met before (memory isn't that great for those of the group she brings one night only).

And I keep searching through everything to figure out why I like her. I can only thing that maybe it's our commonalities, but I can't quite think of any other reasons. I almost always end up thinking, 'nah, there's no way it would work out for long, and even if it did, it'd always be prolonging the inevitable breakup, and it's just better to maintain a solid friendship anyway.

Yet anytime I'm caught off guard, and she's brought up, all those feelings rise right back up and get caught in my throat. I think I genuinely care for her romantically, but she has no idea, and (from what I can tell) no interest either.



I have no illusions about myself. I'm not a stuck up douchebag and I'm not an asshole jock. I don't run with any in-crowd (or out-crowd for that matter), I'm not a bad influence, and I'm not in any way a bad guy. In all honesty, I consider myself one of the most spotless in the group. And somehow I have absolutely no love life to speak of whatsoever.


My two best friends both have beautiful caring girlfriends. My friend who never dates is actually in a friggen' relationship. And I, the hopeless romantic, remain proof that nice guys finish last. (If at all.)


I just think it's all kind of interesting. And by interesting I mean pissing me off.

I mean, what can I do?

The only conceivable option at the moment is an old friend of mine who was actually an old flame of mine who I cheated with on my (now) ex-girlfriend, three years ago. She might be joining the 'group' I'm in, which would be cool, but even then there's not much of a chance she'd have many feelings for me left over. Last time I even tried to approach her, she gave me a clear 'hell no.'

Anyone else who likes me is either fat, stupid, or a whore. (Funny how that happens. And by funny I mean not funny at all. But you knew that.)

Anyway... There's not much to say about my love life other than the fact that it's nonexistent and I am nearly powerless to change it.








I think I'm just going to end the journal entry here, with the promise of quicker updates in the near future, and a lot of REMNANTS to look forward to in October. Be expecting the first monster-sized issue! I still have to figure out how to make one long file, but I think I'll manage it somehow.


My plans for tomorrow are getting up early, picking up Pippin and Dillon, heading to OTC for the College Welcome day, asking questions about tuition and books, and then heading back to Pippin's house and chillin' with them for the day. I finally get to stay out of the house for a night tomorrow night and don't have to come home until Saturday morning, which is amazing considering most nights I have to be at the house at 10:00. Even though my official curfew is 12:00. Strange, I know.


I am gonna hit the sack now. I'm starting to get a headache from all this laptop glare. *sigh* Talk to you all soon!




The End.


-Stephen